1. Kids were crazy last night. I couldn’t get them to write for me. Of course, they’re 3 and 7.
2. I’m waiting for Kristen Lamb’s next blog post to tell me how to do it right.
3. I have conflicting advice from two different blogs, so I’m waiting for them to fight it out and tell me the correct rule.
4. I’m still collecting rules on writing. I need to read more writing craft books before I can start.
5. You can’t push this sort of genius. It happens when it happens.
6. I have writer’s block today.
7. I could write, or I could play Planetside 2. They need my help in that virtual war.
8. That clickbait about “When you see this picture, your jaw will drop!” or “Mind. Blown,” with a thumbnail intriguing enough that I have to find out what it says? There’s chains of that stuff. It’s like smoking, but much, much worse for your body. Must… click… next… blurb. “Top 5 underdressed red carpet leading ladies.” “Kanye’s simple trick that will earn you millions.”
Look, you guys, if you write 2000 words a day, you will finish your book in a month and a half. So easy!
Over 20 years, you could have written 14,600,000 words if you did 2000 words a day. That adds up to 146 books of 100,000 words. It’s 243 books of 60,000 words. It’s hard to ignore an author with a body of work that large.
Perhaps you’re giving me the wall-eyed stare. I had a professor who taught a very nifty landlord/tenant class at the local community college who was wall-eyed. You could never tell if he was calling on you. He’d have to point. The class materials were useful, though. I wish I’d had the class back before I’d rented from the one lousy landlord who decided to keep our deposit.
Yeah. Wall-eyed stare. “If that’s true, Pontius, why haven’t you finished <i>your</i> book?”
*Ahem*. Yes. There is that. I’m working on it! I’ve got excuses saved up, and I’m going to sell those on amazon instead. “The Book of Trite Excuses Why I’m Not Finishing My Novel Timely You Guys,” that’s the title.
If you wrote 3000 words a day, you could finish a novel in 20 days. It’s a month and change if you want 100,000 words.
So, what’s your excuse for not finishing a novel? Join me wallowing in guilt! Comment away. And then get back to writing.
Author Matt Bowes and the Dog's Breakfast 